Eastern Conference Predictions

This weekend marks the beginning of the NBA Playoffs. The writers at Volume Shooters have collaborated to give you a comprehensive and thorough break-down of each match-up. And even if that isn't completely true, we at least matched all the teams up correctly. Today we preview the Eastern Conference playoff picture; tomorrow we'll visit the West.

(1) Miami Heat vs. (8) BYE Milwaukee Bucks

We believe this is Monta kissing the Bucks' hopes good-bye.

The Tweener - Bids Punched, Gross Beards, and a Phi-Slamma-Jamma Baby!

On February 26, I wrote an inaugural "Tweener" column. It's that time of the week: here are this issue's quick hitters:

• Liberty University found a way to win four games in a row in their conference tournament, and they are advancing to be sacrificial lambs for some one seed in the first round the NCAA tournament for the first time since 2004. Reporters on the scene detailed that students from the heavily-evangelist-influenced university were allowed to celebrate by staying out an extra 15 minutes (until 9:30, since 9-3=6 and that's the devils number) and have an extra glass of chocolate milk before bed. Former Liberty player Seth Curry, also headed to the NCAA tournament with Duke, has evidently been dealing with shin-splints the entire season and no longer regularly participates in practice. (Next week I'll lay out some predictions and picks for the tournament, but I will note here that while Duke looked great against UNC, it took two different players playing their best basketball at different times, as Curry appeared worn out after a sensational first half.) As I read this, I assumed it would hurt his draft stock. Turns out, he's projected to be selected somewhere late in the second round, if he gets selected at all. I thought a bit more about where he fits best, and suddenly it dawned on me - the Miami Heat. Of course at this point any player would probably fit well with the Heat, but as Miami moves away from the Mike Miller/Ray Allen/Shane Battier/Old Instructor from the new Priceline ads Rashard Lewis era, who better to have step in than a young, two position shooter? Miami has a good record of turning these kinds of guys into valuable assets (Chalmers & Cole), and he could certainly give you more than 4 minutes at a time without having back spasms.

ASG Roundtable

Last weekend a group of well paid athletes gathered to walk around a basketball court and throw down a few dunks.  The next night, a group of athletes that make even more money gathered to do the same thing in the NBA's annual All Star Game. Whether you're bored at work or bored at home, here is our live discussion of the event, beginning Sunday, February 17th at 8:30 PM (Eastern...of course.)

Brian: Hey there America - welcome to the first (of hopefully many) NBA All Star Game live blogs, delivered to you courtesy of Jack, Brian, and the artist formerly known as Paul, who decided to spend the first half with family, instead of making jokes about Ne-Yo and everything Russell Westbrook has worn this weekend. Jack, what's happening?

Jack: Ne-Yo actually sounds pretty bad. So bad I muted it and looked up "Let me love you" on youtube to listen to it instead. As far as outfits go, Craig Sager's jacket tonight may have won the weekend contest. He's only been on tv once tonight, but there's already an article on SportsNation entitled "Craig Sager is wearing the most ridiculous suit for the All Star game."

Brian: I saw that fake ESPN tweeted "I wonder how many pimps Sager killed in the 70s to make that jacket?" Pissed I didn't think of that myself. Anyway, I think the real question we need answered is: which All Star partied the hardest this weekend? Melo is the early favorite based on his interview, but my dark horse is James Harden. First time at the ASG, rising star, crazy beard...there's a decent chance he hasn't slept since Thursday.

Build Your Own Batmobile: How Average NBA Players Would Make Incredible Intramural Teams

Brian: Gentlemen, good morning. We are happy to bring our readers (all 4 of them) a treat today - we will be live drafting teams that we would consider to be "the best intramural team" made possible with non-All Star NBA players. The intent is to pick guys that have never made an all-Star game or first-team anything, but would have any intramural team in the country begging on their knees to be allowed to bring the ball past midcourt.

We will pick 7 players each, snake draft style, with at least 3 guards and 2 post players on each team. To determine the first pick, Paul picked a conference, Jack picked a team, and I picked a random player and we each had 5 seconds to guess their career points total. We came up with Western-Blazers-Luke Babbitt and Paul won the rights to the first pick with an amazing guess of 310 (actual total was 297). My mediocre at best guess of 3500 was good for second pick, and Jack "Portland Soccer Mom" Peterson will be bringing up the rear with a mind-numbingly poor guess of 6,789. Without further ado, Jack and Paul!

Paul: Alright lets get it started! After an embarrassingly easy victory guessing the career point total of Luke Babbitt (really Jack you guessed almost 7,000 points?), for the first pick on any streetbal-style team, you want a player with a silky J, wicked crossover move, good size, and a little bit of a mean streak. My selection has checked all those boxes over the course of his 13-year career, but despite scoring over 50 in a game for 3 different teams and leading the NBA in all-time 4 point plays, has never been an all-star selection, with his career highlights including a 6th man of the year award. Generally shoddy defense non-withstanding (but really who plays D in intramurals), with the first overall pick, I select Jamal "J-Crossover" Crawford of the Los Angeles Clippers.